I got it from my momma...
- Unapologetic Prim
- Jan 1, 2019
- 4 min read
Updated: Jan 10, 2019
Future employers, friends and random strangers, you have no idea how much it hates to bite my tongue and stop myself from saying "you can thank my mom for that" every time someone compliments me on the following characteristics. I wish I was exaggerating but these are attributes so engraved in my DNA and hammered into my soul through regular loving correction from my mother. And I'm sure my mother would not object to me saying this is possible because I'm also just a good daughter, I learn easily. Also doesn't hurt that I am a creature of habit but that's a story for another day.
Characteristic 1: Domestic Duties
Before my fellow feminists come for me I would like to disclose that I believe that everyone regardless of sex should know domestic chores and how to execute them but sadly that's not the case for many of us. While my mother was a working mom she made sure I was up early on holidays pitching in with the maid to get household chores done. Who knew these skills would be useful as an adult? However, I am sure that hearing her cautioning voice every time I step away from the pot for more than two minutes is a bit excessive but once in a while I find myself proud that I hardly burn the things I cook...that cloud of smoke that lingers is from the oil, I swear.
Characteristic 2: Punctuality
This one is a little bit fuzzy. I'm actually not sure if it's from years of affirmation or it just runs in our blood. My mother is the most organised and punctual person I know. If she has an appointment she'll be there an hour early. Which means I am not only on time, I am usually ridiculously early for anything. I meet deadlines ahead of time and everything is impeccably organised. I'm ready with information that wasn't even required. I have contingency plans for my back up plans. Don't get me wrong, I am flexible and I adapt easily but I prefer having everything ready way before time, it gives me a sense of maturity which, in retrospect, doesn't offer much reward in itself.
Characteristic 3: Meaning of love
I know you're thinking I'm stating the obvious but while many of you learnt about how love presents itself from your fathers I got that lesson from my mother. She is the best mother to all six of us and she shows us love in unlabeled actions. During the time when the economy started to sink in Zimbabwe and the shelves were empty and people's pockets were even emptier, I noticed that more often than not I'd wake up to find a chocolate bar under my pillow. I wasn't blind, I knew she was struggling to keep everything afloat so I asked her why she did that in the midst of the chaos and suffering. She explained that she was trying to teach me that the person who loves you will find a way to show you that you're special regardless of the situation and how bad things around you seem. While I fall short numerous times, I strive to love the people in my life in that manner.
Characteristic 4: How to read and laugh
While many mothers read to their children my mother did the opposite. Everyday she'd come from work with a printed copy of the "Joke of the day" from a website she was subscribed to. She'd hand it to me and have me read it back to her, encouraging me to ask if I came across a word I didn't know. This became our tradition from the time was 7 or 8 years old and continued even when I went to boarding school when I was 13 years old. I'd come for the holidays and she'd have a folder filled with every "Joke of the day" that I had missed while I was away. So not only did I have a good incentive to learn how to read, I cultivated a sense of humour that has sailed with me through any situation in my life.
Characteristic 5: Being beautiful
For as long as I can remember I've always wanted to look as beautiful as my mother. I used to sit by her and just run my hands over her flawless and soft skin. I could get lost feeling her smooth skin for hours. I even prayed that I'd inherit her skin and for the most part I got my wish. When my baby teeth fell out, and I realised that I was going to have to live with a missing front tooth, my mother was the anchor for my wavering confidence. She was always there to remind me that I was beautiful...just that I was beautiful. It was never "even though you have jacked up teeth, you are beautiful" or "despite your wide shoulders and narrow hips". I was just beautiful.
I learnt so much from my mother but these are the most noteworthy and my absolute favourites. So next time I crack a joke in the middle of a serious situation, and proceed to laugh my head off despite my terrible smile, it's my mother's fault. And if I'm super early for our meeting and I show up with supplies, that's also my mother. Basically, I'm trying to say my endearing and sometimes quirky qualities are probably from my mother.
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